I love this epic body of mine. And yes, I said it… she’s epic. Why? Because there isn’t a moment that goes by when she doesn’t know exactly what I need. She soothes me when I’m anxious; she coddles me when I’m sad; she wraps me up in her arms when I need a safe place to unwind. And it doesn’t end there. Her warmth flows out into everyone around me – she takes care of my family; she stirs pots full of good food to fill the bellies of those I love with sweet wholesome nourishment (like potato and kale soup, our favorite!); she says “I love you” to my man; and when I lose someone dear, she seeks out the arms of friends to hold her close.
I am constantly reminded of my body’s wisdom – I see it as easily as I see the sun rise in the morning. As I sit here writing this, I can feel my body smiling – I can feel it on my lips, and in the warmth of my heart, and in the tingling of my toes… She’s even blushing a little! Oh, I love her and her small quirks. They’re like sweet honey to me.
Honestly though, I can’t believe how much we’ve been through in this lifetime together. Truth is, I wasn’t always this kind to her. Even today I sometimes judge her harshly. Just like so many women out there, I’ll catch myself criticizing her weight gain; I’ll hear myself judging her flaccid belly skin; I’ll notice the disappointment I feel toward her weakening muscles.
I can quickly turn against her. When she gets injured, I sigh. I look at her with great and profound frustration. Instead of taking responsibility for her injuries, I blame her. Yet, I’m the one who pushes her to do things she shouldn’t. I’m the one who’s telling her to run faster, and dance better, and work harder.
The thing is that sometimes my over analytic mind gets the best of me. All my mind wants from me is more sit ups, higher kicks, lower squats, and the list goes on! And when I listen to my domineering mind, I push my body until she breaks. And then she does break. And then what do I do? I sigh again. And she hears me. And she deflates. My chest concaves, my back rounds, my head bends. She totally, completely, turns in on herself. She gets smaller.
Truth be told, this is me kicking her when she’s down. And I feel her feeling that she has failed me. I feel her get so, so sad. And I know you’ve been here too. It’s a well known place for a woman in a world like ours. So, I’ve had to work at this. I’ve had to work to bring love to my body over and over again. I’ve had to resist against this ingrained war against the feminine body. But this is what my mission is all about – to bring women into their most radiant selves, to have them feeling loved, and enlivened, and epic.
So, it happens less often now than it did before, but this body reclamation and elevation journey is a lifelong practice. The second you let your boundaries down in this masculine-focused world is the second you will be inundated with impossible body, beauty, and athletic standards. The second you let your boundaries down is the second you start to hurt. These standards are absolutely unattainable. They’re not healthy, and they’re definitely not kind. More than anything else, they’re not what your body wants or needs.
If you come with me, you’ll be on the road to epic body love. And I’m not going to lie, it is a slippery slope. You’ll walk forward five yards and then you’ll slip backwards by three. And there’s nothing we can do about that because the world isn’t designed for empowered women so neither are our minds. But we can rise above this. We can come out on top trust me. There’s a powerful, pleasure-filled, you that’s waiting to be discovered.
How do you discover her? It takes a never-ending, constant remembering of the absolute beauty and power of yourself. It takes being a champion. In a nutshell, it takes you. Because youare your own champion. And thank Goddess I realized this. Because everybody needs a champion. Everybody needs someone to step in front of the bullets that society can sometimes shoots at the female body. Even if those bullets are coming directly from you – in fact, especially if those bullets are coming directly from you.
In my life, I learned how to love from my mother. I think, if you take a look at your own life, there will be a woman who you know that shines through the darkness – there’ll be a woman you know who can teach you how to love. When you find her – learn from her. Let her show you how to become your body’s biggest champion. Let yourself rise up, into a state of pure body bliss. After years of work, I am now my body’s biggest champion and I protect her fiercely. Yes, I love her passionately and I pamper her tenderly. She deserves it!
And even though I am here confessing to you all of these challenges I have gone through with my body know that there is an end in sight. I’m simply using my struggles as a gift to you. My hope is that they make you feel seen, and soothed, and somehow validated. My hope is they show you that there’s so much more available to you if you only allow your controlling mind to quiet and your body to awaken.
As I said before, it’s a constant quest. But I’m here, and I’m doing it. So, today I will catch myself with the snap of my fingers when I misbehave toward my body. I will teach myself to hold my body in higher and higher esteem every second of the day. I will be her greatest hero as she has been mine. And I make this vow in front of you all – naked, unafraid, and pure of heart. I’m confessing to you moment by moment. And I vow to continue to transform all of it.
My greatest wish is that you will vow to do this too…
So on that note: I have a challenge for you! I challenge you to write an epic love letter to your body. In this letter, I want you to acknowledge her: What does she do for you? How does she move you through your life? Who does she hug and kiss and keep safe for you? What is she doing now, that’s as easy as breathing but hasn’t yet been appreciated by you?
Let her know. I’m sure she can’t wait to hear. And neither can I.
